Sometimes I sit and words just pour out of me. Not necessarily where I intend them to go either. Today I was intending to finish up my homework for the week because of Friday. However I had writer’s block and read the textbook instead. I unearthed the baby book and was looking through it and was just overwhelmed with feelings. I haven’t opened it in two years. Two years. I haven’t really been in a place where I could open it and not see red. Things are different now to some degree, I have perspective. I decided to share the book with Ezra and we picked some new photos to put in it. He was asking questions about certain pictures and I was honest. I was just really proud of how he handled the answers.
His birthday party went really good. This was the least stressful birthday ever. Even with my brother pulling a fast one on me it was still calm. My sister came and I got to see my nephew. My friends came and Ezra got to play with his best friends. And I got to relax with my friends before my surgery. Like no drama, no talking about his dad just nada. I got to see my little brother for the first time in a year *shocked face* it was nice.
Once I’m all better from surgery I’m gonna finish getting stuff on the kindergarten supply list. I’m so excited for him. He loves his new backpacks. He’s finally coming around to the idea that he won’t have the same teachers. I’m gonna miss them too tbh, they were amazing and i loved how they loved my son. I hope we develop that same type of relationship with his kindergarten teacher as well. I realize that once I start working my relationships with his teachers will change. However I want to always make sure either myself or my parents is a known presence in his class. My parents did that for me and it made a difference.
I’ve been writing a lot. I’m kinda shocked by what I’m writing. It’s revealing.
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